Sarah Ann Gould married Buchanan Cady in Harlan County, Nebraska on 15 May 1881. He was 23. she was 20.
Based on what I know of Buchanan, Sarah and their families this might have been seen as a typical marriage of families with similar backgrounds- her brothers had been merchants before their move to Nebraska and Buchanan was a tradesman, a painter and both families were rooted in New England. Or it might have been an escape for Sarah from the fate the her society often decreed for the youngest daughter of older parents – a life time of care taking.
In any case Buchanan and Sarah appear, from the record, to have set up a household and begun having children quite quickly. By the time the 1885 Nebraska State Census taker found them in Republican City, Harlan County on 6 June they had 3 children, Mabel, Nina and Fayette (named for Buchanan’s father Lafayette.) 10 years later the 1895 Iowa State Census taker found the family in Fort Dodge, Wahkansa County, Iowa. The family appeared to be complete with the addition of son Vernon who was 7 years old and things seemed settled.
But five years later…..
In 1900 the census taker found widow Sarah and her 5 children (a “late” son, Lloyd, having arrived in 1895) living at 609 Central Ave in Fort Dodge. But wait…. “Bucky” Cady, widower, painter, born Vermont, is living just 1 block away in the 700 block of Central Ave in Fort Dodge. Okay – informal divorce is not unheard of in 1900’s Nebraska, although this is the first time I’ve seen both parties, living so close together, state that they are widowed. Perhaps the separation was recent, since Lloyd was only 5 years old. In the 1902 Fort Dodge City Directory Buchanan is living in the Merchants Hotel and Sarah and the kids are living at 816 1st N. Also in town is Martha Cady, widow of Lafayette and mother of Buchanan. So I think I know why the family moved to Fort Dodge.
And then things got really odd.
on 2 May 1903, in Fort Dodge, Wahkansa County, Iowa Buchanan Cady married Sarah A. Cady!!!
It is clearly the same couple – the parents of both, ages, birthplaces all match and the witnesses include Nina Cady. Further more the records clearly states that this is the second marriage for the groom and the second marriage for the bride. What on earth? I have been unable to find a divorce record. The couple themselves were stating to census takers that they were both “widowed.” It seems clearly obvious to me that a second marriage would have no legal validity and of course this is long, long before the idea of a “renewal of vows.”
And sadly, by 1905 “Buck” Cady is once again living alone in Webster County Iowa. Sarah and the kids appear to have returned to Nebraska by 1905 as Sarah is the witness for the marriage of her daughter Mabelle Edna to Charles Reed on 20 December 1905. In 1910 “Benjamin” Cady, Vermont born, painter, divorced is living in Fort Dodge, Iowa and Sarah Cady, Pennsylvania born, widow is living in Alma, Harlan County Nebraska. And to keep the twists coming in 1920 Sarah is listed as married and living in Alma while Buchanan is divorced and living in a hospital for the treatment of tuberculous in Kearney, Buffalo County, Nebraska. Were they in touch? Did Sarah know he was being treated for a potentially deadly disease? In 1930 Sarah and Buchanan while still living apart, in separate counties actually, both list themselves on the census as married. And in his final census appearance Buchanan is a patient in a nursing home in Lincoln Nebraska in 1940 and he is listed as married. However Sarah has moved with daughter Nina to Boulder County Colorado and has returned to being listed as widowed.
They apparently reconciled in death however as both are buried in the Alma Cemetery in Alma, Harlan County, Nebraska. This is the final twist in what appears to have been a very complicated relationship. Married, separated, remarried, separated, divorced? I’ll keep looking for a divorce record, but honestly I don’t think one exists. I think that this was a single marriage that remained valid until they day they died. They just couldn’t live together and perhaps they couldn’t really cut the ties either.
Sarah & Bucky were my Great Grandparents. I never knew them and my Grandmother (married to Lloyd Cady-their son) never really knew the reason they didn’t live together. She said he was prone to drinking but there’s never been anything to substantiate that claim and he did live a long life. Interestingly, Sarah & Nina moved to Boulder where she lived on Pearl Street and died by an accident slipping into a hot bath.
Michael;
Its good to meet another cousin. The issues may have been on both sides. My father who knew his grandparents and who knew his father’s opinion of his grandparents relayed to me that the “Goulds were a difficult bunch and so were the in-laws.” So who knows.